I eventually got these instructions to work:
1.. Right-click the file and select Properties.At my count, that's 7 levels of nested dialogs. And my name didn't show up in the list for step 12 so I had to Add "APM\andrew" (obviously, users would know to type that). Who designs this stuff? Who reviews it? Microsoft is supposed to hire all these really smart people, but they still seem to produce a lot of stupid stuff.
2.. Click on the Security tab.
3.. Click Advanced in the lower right.
4.. In the Advanced Security Settings window that pops up, click on the Owner tab.
5.. Click Edit.
6.. Click Other users or groups.
7.. Click Advanced in the lower left corner.
8.. Click Find Now.
9.. Scroll through the results and double-click on your current user account.
10.. Click OK to all of the remaining windows except the first Properties window.
11.. Select your user account from the list up top and click Edit.
12.. Select your user account from the list up top again and then in the pane below, check Full control under Allow, or as much control as you need.
13.. You'll get a security warning, click Yes.
14.. On some files that are essential to Windows, you'll get a "Unable to save permission changes. access is denied" warning and there's nothing that you can do about it to the best of my knowledge.
15.. Reconsider why you're using Windows.